Are you being true to yourself. Are you… truly?

Are you creating the life YOU truly desire or are you striving for someone else’s definition of the perfect life & success?

Last week I asked: ”What do you what to be when you grow up? And WHO do you want to be?”

It’s easy to respond by reeling off a description which conjures images of a very impressive, admirable, philanthropic & lovable person. We’d all love to be that sort of person. The problem is, that amazing person you’re describing and striving to be, may still be nothing like you – the REAL YOU.

Much unhappiness comes when you’re not being true to yourself, when you’re not honouring yourself & your core values – when you do what you feel you ‘should’ do and are trying to live out other people’s expectations of what the ‘ideal person’ is.

This usually leaves you feeling pretty hollow.

That’s because that ‘ideal person’ – the pin-up girl (or boy) your parents will rave on to their friends about at dinner parties, the one your friends will look to with envy & admiration, the one that ticks ALL the ‘perfect’ boxes, will be very unlike the real you.

Not because the real you is not impressive, admirable or outstanding – far from it! The real you is mind-blowingly awesome! However, the real YOU didn’t come out of a box. You have quirks, imperfections, kinky streaks, idiosyncrasies & passions that are out of the ordinary.

You are UNIQUE – this is what makes you so amazingly perfect!

Figure out how to embrace & celebrate this uniqueness and heaven on earth shall be laid out at your feet.

Unfortunately we’re often so busy trying to be the cookie cutter ‘perfect person’ that we don’t honour the unique parts of ourselves. They just don’t seem to fit with the ’10 steps to the Perfect You’ brochure we were handed. So we become less authentic, less ‘real’ and soon start feeling it.

Hollow, fake, phoney, smile for the camera: ”Cheese!”

Before long we wind up feeling completely disconnected and eventually – just plain miserable. You’re just not fulfilled.

That’s when you look around & wonder what happened. You tick off the list: 2.3 kids, lovely husband, nice job, well decorated home, nice figure, all your own teeth, good friends. And you wonder: “What the hell is wrong with me?” If you’re not living the life you truly desire, how can you ever expect to achieve life balance? It’s like stepping onto a baseball field carrying a hockey stick.

If we can’t even be honest with ourselves as to who we truly are, then how we can we expect to be happy in the life we end up living?

So it’s time to come clean & embrace the unique-ness of YOU. Admit you DO like to eat peanut butter straight from the jar on hot potato chips; want to walk around the neighbourhood in your pyjamas before dawn; need a nanna nap in the afternoons; hate tupperware parties & would rather skip it – let alone host the damn thing thank you very much; are more comfortable in flat shoes than heels; couldn’t care less about the latest celebrity gossip; prefer to wear Bridget Jones style undies to lacy G-strings & will happily chew your nails rather than pay for a manicure.

Trust me, those who love you already will love you even more – right after they say: ”Err..ok. And… so… What’s the big deal???”

Let go a little bit, loosen your grip. It’s way too tiring, don’t you think? Try being honest, authentic, kind to yourself & just a bit more chilled. Just less… perfect. Apart from stressful, trying to be perfect is also pretty damn BORING – and cruel.

A rich, full life full lived with INTEGRITY is the most satisfying thing you can have. I highly recommend it!

I wish you nothing less.

Much love,

xx Miriam

PS: Let me know what you think below – don’t be shy!