I remember keeping busy – really, REALLY busy – ALL the time.
I’m talking day & night – at home & work.
I clung to it like a badge of honour: “I’m so busy.. gosh I’m busy!” And you know what? I was GREAT at keeping busy.
There were always errands to run, rooms to re-decorate, dinner parties to throw. There was cleaning & tidying to be done and always more cleaning, washing, re-arranging of furniture and of course more cleaning.
I kept myself damn busy – it re-enforced that ‘busy woman’ badge of honour and it fooled everyone – or at least they politely played along. It also helped me fool myself and stopped me from facing the nagging feeling I wasn’t living the life I was meant for.
We can be masters of deception. We enlist the help of others who dutifully play along with our little game. They egg us on & praise our ‘impressive’ efforts – usually because they’re carrying on the same charade. So we all play the game: “Oh wow – yes, me too. I’ve been on the run ALL DAY.”
Busy – busy – busy… busy keeping busy.
We keep this up – usually until we collapse or wake up thinking: “Hang on – what the HELL am I doing?”
Speaking to other women, this seems a common theme. They use the same language: “I used to be so busy all the time. I was obsessive. I’d never sit still. Thank God I’m no longer like that.”
Nowadays I love to sit still. I enjoy quietly sitting in the company of those I love, or just on my own.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m still busy – damn busy – we all are. But I’m busy doing things I love, things that make me feel I’m living my life’s purpose, things that fill my soul.
I’m just busy living.
I also choose WHEN I’m busy and when I’m not. I’m no longer just a slave to being busy. I control the busy part of my life and have no guilt over turning off the phone at night to enjoy uninterrupted time with my family.
This is the real secret to work-life balance. When everything you do is in harmony with your true nature then you simply choose how to divide your time between all the things that nourish your soul. It’s no longer about forcibly stopping a less pleasant part of your life from taking over another ‘more pleasant’ part.
I’m now perfectly comfortable just sitting still, enjoying a beautiful view, having a long, slow cuddle with someone I love, lying lazily in bed on a Sunday morning. I’d never allow myself that before.
Busy – busy- busy!
The ‘busy’-ness I lived before was simply an avoidance tactic. Lest I sit still and find I’m not really happy with how I’m living my life!
Is it singing for joy or pleading for help?
Your turn: let me know what you think about being busy for the sake of it. Scroll down – express yourself!